Finding a motivation to achieve your goals could be the bridge that link towards its realization. Most of us have goals that we aspire to reach. It enables you to strive harder and do better in what you are currently doing, whether at home, school, or work. And when faced with obstacles, some people readily admit defeat and give up on their goals.

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When you are going about your normal daily business, in a 24-hour period your brain will naturally cycle through four predominant states (sometimes called brainwave states).

The first and most relaxed state is called ‘delta,’ which is around 1-3hz. You experience this when you are in an extremely deep, dreamless sleep.

One step up from delta is called ‘theta.’ Theta is a very dreamy state that you will experience during normal dreaming while you are asleep, and theta is characterized by 4-7hz brainwave activity.

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Does the word “Motivation” have a charge for you? Do you notice that when you get ready to begin certain projects curious personal behaviors emerge? Have you noticed the desire to stop reading this article altogether? This topic can be a bit overwhelming.

How many of us have listened to “motivational speakers” and wanted someone to just, oh, I don’t know, perhaps shush them up!!! Or how about reading books on motivation and finding that you don’t even have the motivation to finish the book? As a human and a coach this issue comes up often. The common thread is that many of us have behaviors that seem to undermine the desire to complete something that we really want to do.

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Part Four in the “Coming Into Your Own” Series

For most of us, the need to have productive and intimate relationships is very important. We work on improving our marriages and friendships and sometimes, although unproductively, we try to work on others, too.

We often think we will be happy when our relationships are happy. This thought process is really backwards. In other words, our relationships will be happier ones when we are happier with ourselves. A big piece in coming into your own is to have the courage to “go at it alone” for a while.

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If you want to talk about a limiting perspective on life that can take you out of the game faster than anything, it is what I call the “perfectionist frame.” The feeling or belief that whatever you are doing or working on has to be nothing less than perfect or it is unacceptable.

There are many possible places this comes from, whether it’s having parents who put that kind of pressure and expectation on you as a child, the experience of actually having done some thing(s) to perfection in the past and developing a compulsive attachment to that experience, wanting to show everything and everyone that you can do it or ultimately you really are better then them at the end of the day, the fear of “screwing up” or letting people down, fear or criticism, and on and on and on.

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In the United States today, any person, male or female, can easily obtain a ministerial license by sending off a hundred dollars in the mail to one, of many, license dispensing organizations. After getting a license, an aspiring organizer can advertise their own brand of religion in a large city newspaper, such as the “New York Times” and, within a week, have at least ten receptive believers in his, or her, congregation. I’m sure Jim Jones and the Peoples’ Temple conjure up horrible visions of murder, suicide, mayhem, and the vicious betrayal of public trust in the minds of the relatives of those unfortunate victims of the Jonestown massacre. Nonetheless, few objectively religious Americans presently realize how easy it is for sexually aberrant leaders within certain religious sects to gain the total confidence of their supplicant families, in order to, over time, ravenously satisfy their sexual appetites with the innocence of young trusting children.

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